Move over elections and reality show votes; 2024’s hot idea? Let the BBC crown the most ‘woke’ contestant as the ultimate winner. Got an issue with that? Well, here’s the scoop.

From the get-go, it was crystal clear that Mary Earps would snatch the Sports Personality Of The Year title. Why, you ask? Oh, just because she dropped an impressive F-bomb while losing at the World Cup. Talk about making an entrance!

Hosts Alex Scott, Clare Balding, and the fantastic Gabby Logan (seriously, she’s got a way with words!) set the stage. But really, all this show needed was Gabby’s sass to shut down anyone daring to question the ‘woke’ agenda.

The show itself? Downsized but still packin’ a punch, especially when it comes to making politically correct statements. Take the Unsung Hero category, where ticking off ‘right-on’ boxes felt like a sport in itself. Burka-clad women versus Windrush Generation dudes? Check!

But wait, the night’s main dish was the Women’s World Cup football. Cue the drama! We had a hate minute for a Spanish lip-kisser and a sprinkle of Maya Angelou quotes, delivered with a side of self-righteousness. Alex Scott’s on a roll—nothing gets her going like a good offense.

And the winner? Surprise, surprise. Mary Earps takes the crown. But let’s face it, with a shortlist that tossed aside sporting heroes like Josh Kerr and Ronnie O’Sullivan, the outcome was as predictable as England’s soccer games being described as ‘glorious’ by biased commentators.

Oh, and don’t get me started on the BBC’s unwavering adoration for women’s football. They think it’s as delicate as a soap bubble, unable to handle a bit of criticism. Newsflash, folks: football’s funny, glorious, and occasionally flawed. But shh, don’t tell the cult leaders at the BBC.

Kudos to King Kenny Dalglish for daring to challenge the status quo with his “It’s about winning” line. At least someone’s speaking sense in a room full of BBC-driven doctrine.

Switching lanes to Strictly Come Dancing—where representation and lectures on it are as frequent as bad dance moves. Layton Williams might’ve had the BBC’s favor, but the public’s not one to be pushed around. They sniffed out the Beeb’s game and crowned their own champ.

TV not without its share of quirks, like game show contestants mistaking Kinder Scout for Regent’s Park and confusing Rosie Lee with whisky. And let’s not forget the gem of a subtitle mishap—always good for a laugh.

But amidst the chaos, there are shining moments: Bill Maher schooling bigots, 24 Hours In Police Custody’s gripping reality, The Crown’s surprising emotions, and Simon Brodkin cracking a historic laugh at the Royal Variety Performance.

That’s the telly circus for you, folks. Until next time, keep your eyes peeled for the unexpected and your remotes handy for when the ‘woke’ speeches get a bit too much!